FIVE THINGS I SAY TO EVERY NEW MOM during a postpartum doula shift
Here are the top 5 things I say to new moms when I show up for any and all postpartum visits.
Seriously, if I work with a mom three days a week for the first 12 weeks,
I say these 5 things Every. Single. Time.
Please feel free to steal these and use them instead of the traditional "Is your baby a good baby?", "Does he sleep through the night yet" and "Enjoy it, this is the best time of your life".
I love providing tips like these (and more!) to the postpartum doulas in my Postpartum Doula Academy - but wanted to share these with everyone.
1. "I'm not someone you clean the house for. I fully expect to arrive to a messy house and un-showered parents." This is actually what I send via text the night before my visit. I do not need a new mom spending precious time and energy running around and tidying up her house. I will do that for her while she naps and showers.
2. "How was last night?" This lets me know how feeding and sleeping are going and where our focus needs to be for the day. It's also incredibly satisfying to vent to a non-judgmental doula about how many times your baby woke up and how long they were awake. As a doula, it’s important to just L I S T E N. Only offer advice if mom asks for it.
3. "Is your pain the same, better or worse?" If a new mom is having nipple pain, c-section incision pain or vaginal pain, it's important to know if it is improving or getting worse. But mostly, it's important to acknowledge that she may be in pain. And to listen to her answers.
4. "What do you need most - Sleep, Food, Shower or Talk?" It's ALWAYS one of those four things. Always. And a postpartum doula helps a mom get all four.
5. "You are doing a great job!" I have yet to meet a woman who is not a wonderful, caring mother who is doing her best every single day. It's really important that we acknowledge this!
